Have you ever met an individual and immediately thought to yourself, “Wow, they really have their shi*t together”? Yeah… me too! As a 20-something, I am still in that stage of life where I find it weird to think of myself as a “grown-up”. It’s a funny stage to be in when half of your friends are out getting married and having babies, while the other half are out partying every night. I often find myself wondering when I am going to wake up and feel like a true adult!
The other day I came across a woman who was probably a few years older than I was. Her hair and makeup were done flawlessly, she and her daughter were wearing matching mommy-and-me outfits, and they were out at brunch looking like they just had the best morning ever. There was something about this woman that made me instantly think, “Wow, that’s how I want to be one day.” Something about her just seemed so grown-up, mature, graceful, and put together. I pictured her having the perfect house (that’s probably always clean), working at some amazing job, having lots of dinner parties, and heading off to her country house each summer with the whole family.
I’m sure if this woman were reading this, she would laugh her booty off at the perfect life I envisioned her having. I used to think all those things made up the “ideal adult”, but I have come to learn that NONE of these things actually make you an adult. Being an adult looks different to everyone and it probably means something different to everyone too. I am by no means a master at the art of #adulting, but I have picked up on some realistic ways you can win at adulting. So, I’m excited to share how you can be the best grown-up ever!
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Create a budget and stick to it
There is this common misconception that the only people who need to have a budget are those who are struggling for money. And this could not be any farther from the truth! Having a budget is essential whether you have 100 dollars in your bank account or 1 million dollars. I’m certainly not here to tell you how you should budget your expenses, because everyone has their own priorities and their own goals when it comes to money. However, a good rule of thumb that I always follow is NOT to save what you have after spending, but spend what you have after saving. Once you have gone ahead and created your budget plan, make sure you actually stick to it! Keep track of where you are at financially, and hold yourself to your budget.
Set aside money for an emergency fund
While we’re on the topic of money, don’t forget to factor emergencies into your budget! You NEVER know when something unexpected is going to smack you right in the face. Whether your car breaks down or your dog has to have emergency surgery, always make sure you are prepared for the worst. It would be pretty awful if you got a flat tire and you didn’t have any money left over to buy a new one, wouldn’t it? Always give yourself a buffer so if when an emergency arises, you are fully prepared to tackle the problem like the bada$$ adult that you are!
Have a system for taxes
Nothing screams “adult” more than the concept of taxes. To make tax time a whole lot easier, create a system for yourself that makes sense in your home. Have a filing system for receipts and write-offs, and keep all supporting documents in one place, like a folder or filing cabinet. That way when tax time rolls around, you aren’t spending hours (or days) scrambling to find everything you need. It will also ensure you don’t forget anything! I touched upon this briefly in one of my previous posts, 8 Ways to Stay Organized.
Build your credit
I never knew how important having a good credit score could be until recently. When starting out in the “adult world”, it seems like your credit score is used to determine everything! Therefore, you should start early in building your credit and also check your score frequently. A good and easy way to build credit and maintain a good score as a 20-something is to take out a credit card, use it often, and always pay the bill on time. Furthermore, you should make sure you are paying all of your student loans when payments are due, and clear yourself of any other existing debts.
Set goals
These should not be things like, “I want to be rich and famous” or “I want to be a Victoria’s Secret model.” Although I do believe in having dreams, you also need to set realistic goals for yourself that will help you in life. If you have a goal of owning your dream home one day, don’t just fantasize about it, but actually set it as a goal for yourself. Determine the steps you need to take in order to get there and actually carry out the process. You have to sit down and figure out how much money you need to save for a certain period of time in order to get the home you want. The goals you set for yourself should be realistic and have a plan to back them up. In addition to life goals, you should also set financial goals for yourself; long-term goals as well as short-term goals. Determine where you want to be in 2 weeks, as well as where you want to be in 5 years. All of these things will help you have the life that you dream for yourself.
Work, rest, and play
Carry out each of these things because they all have such value in your life. First, work hard at something. If you have a full-time job, work your butt off to be the best employee you can be. If you’re a stay-at-home mom, put everything you have into caring for your children. Or if you happen to be a housewife, work hard at cleaning your house, running the errands, and making your house a home. Whatever you choose to do with your life, give it your all and work hard at being the best you can be.
After you have finished your hard work, find time to rest. Set aside time for some good old fashion self-care. If you need some ideas on how to practice self-care, read this post, Practicing Self-Care. Whether you decide to read, binge-watch your favorite TV show, or have a spa day, find time for yourself and just rest.
When your work is done and you have fully rested, don’t forget to play! Whatever hobbies you enjoy, find a way to do them. Play video games, meet your friends for a drink or go golfing with your buddies. Whatever you have fun doing, make time to do it. Having this balance in your adult-life is so important and will ultimately make you a happier person.
Learn to cook
This is still (unfortunately) a work in progress for me, but I am proud to admit that I am making huge strides! As an adult, I think it is so important to know how to cook. You don’t have to be Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen, but find the time to learn how to make a few dishes. I know a lot of people who don’t know how to cook or totally hate doing it, so they eat out quite often. If that’s more your style, you do you, my friend! However, it never hurts to have a few recipes up your sleeve. Therefore, if you want to invite friends over for dinner, you’re not limited to ordering pizza and wings!
Set aside time to workout
Nowadays, there are SO many options when it comes to fitness. If you hate jogging or going to the gym, try taking up yoga, or even a dance class. As an adult, it is more important than ever to take care of you and your body. If you absolutely cannot be convinced in any way to workout, just focus on moving your body each day. That could mean something as simple as taking a walk around your block. Whatever type of fitness you are into, make a conscious effort to do it a few days per week. You will be healthier and your body will thank you for it.
Go to the doctor
Speaking of taking care of your body, don’t forget to go to the doctor! As adults, I feel people are not as good as they should be when it comes to seeing doctors. We no longer have our mommies calling to schedule all our appointments and keep us on top of all our doctor’s visits. However, it is still important to see someone regularly and get yourself checked out. Furthermore, if you feel ill or something just doesn’t seem right to you, don’t wait and tell yourself it’ll pass. Be responsible and get in to see a doctor. I know sometimes it may be awkward or uncomfortable (yes pap smears, I’m talking to you) but you’re a big girl, you can do it! Always, always, always take care of you.
Work on your friendships
Something I found to be drastically different in the adult-world is friendship. When we are younger, making friends and keeping friends is easy. We are constantly surrounded by people our age in school, we see the same people every day, and we can even live with our friends in college. However, as adults, we all tend to go our separate ways and build our own lives. We are no longer surrounded by our best friends all day and fully engrossed in each other’s lives. As adults, it is harder to maintain these friendships as our lives go different ways, but I also think it is SO important to work on keeping these friendships. My friends and I do such a great job (in my opinion) with maintaining and nurturing our friendships. It’s funny how a simple text or call can make your whole week and I encourage you all to make your friendships a priority.
Challenge yourself
Part of being an adult is challenging yourself and stepping outside of your comfort zone. Trying new things, whether you succeed or fail, is how you will grow as an individual and gain confidence in yourself. When you can learn to believe in yourself and have faith in your own capabilities, you can become the best version of you.
Understand its okay to ask for help or advice
There is no shame in asking for help when you need it. You probably have parents, grandparents, or even friends that have been in your exact place before. Don’t be afraid to ask for advice if you don’t understand how something works or if want someone’s opinion. When I first moved out on my own, I’m not even sure I fully understood how a mortgage worked or what it meant to file taxes. And I am not embarrassed to admit I bothered my parents weekly until all my adult-related questions were answered. Part of being an adult is knowing when to ask for help. Don’t ever be ashamed to ask for help when needed and know that it’s okay to not have everything figured out all the time.
So, how are you stacking up? Are you already crushing that adult-life or are you now ready to start tackling the idea of being “grown-up”? Don’t mind me…I’ll just be over here trying to gain the courage to call and make myself a dentist appointment.
